Lamest Person Alive

I'm sorry but Marc Anthony is the world's lamest person. This occurred to me when I was streaming in 106.7 LiteFM into my cubicle and the song "My Baby You" came onto the airwaves. Um, I don't know if any of you have heard the lyrics to this song but apparently he cut and pasted lines from several Hallmark cards and added a stalker-like melody (i.e. "as i look into your eyes i see all the reasons why my life's worth a thousand skies...") Um-"my life's worth a thousand skies"?--I have two questions about this: 1) is this a joke? and 2) are you kidding me?.

The chorus to this blockbuster hit reads, "my baby you are the reason i could fly and 'cause of you i don't have to wonder why...". Um-am I alone in thinking that these lines don't make any sense? Could these words be any more vague? He needs to calm down here. For the record, this song makes me want to punch somebody out.

I'm not going to go in depth about his spanish music career because obviously his American music is all that counts. But anyway, I'd like to add that his two other American "hits" (depending on who you ask) called "I need to know"and "You sang to me" are both some of the biggest pieces of sh*t that I've ever heard. I've taken it upon myself to read the lyrics to these songs and I assure you that they make no sense, mean nothing, and are definitively lame.

It doesn't help that Marc Anthony's voice sounds like he's singing underwater while simultaneously sitting on a moving rollercoaster. Also, I don't know if you've seen pictures of him, but, for the record, he looks like he hasn't slept in 53 years and hasn't eaten in 12. He also needs to fire his stylist because whoever thought the greasy bohemian guido look was in was seriously mistaken. He's always wearing flowy Italian hair-dresser shirts (unbuttoned), hemp necklaces, chunky rings, and West Side Story hairstyles. Um--is this a joke.

In general, Marc Anthony needs to calm down about his music--it's not great. In my expert opinion, I think he should immediately fire his managers and his wardrobe specialist and start over.